by Stephanie Brill and Lisa Kenney
The authors are the founder, and the executive director of an organization called Gender Spectrum, dedicated to helping us understand gender diversity. The book has fourteen pages of detailed references from studies, reports, documentaries and interviews. Subtitle: A Handbook for Parents and Professionals Supporting Transgender and Non-Binary Teens. I\’m a parent here. We are trying to be supportive but I have to be honest- it\’s difficult. I won\’t have a lot to say solid about this book because there\’s still many things I don\’t understand, and other things that are too personal to our family right now. When you\’re still learning about something- a very large and complicated something with a ton of pressure to get it right because your child\’s health and well-being is possibly at stake- it\’s hard to even see if the sources I have at hand are accurate or not. How can I judge the material when I don\’t have a lot of background information or experience with it? It took me a long time to get through this book- I read it in pieces over the past few months. Really, that should tell me something perhaps- the last book I struggled through had its own issues, which I\’m kinda blind to while I\’m reading. This one sounded great while I was in the pages- definitions explaining unfamiliar terminology, outlines of adolescent developmental stages, reassurances that you\’re not alone, explanations of the unique stressors gender diverse teens go through, ideas on how to foster resiliency and so on- but when I sit back and think about it all, I feel rather let down. Seems like it touched shallowly on many things but never gave answers to the hard questions or concrete enough details in the examples. Also quite a lot of the material is repetitive so that gets boring, frankly. I was still feeling good about it though until I start looking at other reviews on the big site that\’s swallowing the world, and Goodreads. Now some scrutiny throws doubts on how biased the book might be, how lacking in critical information or discussion of the negatives. I received this book from a facilitator at a parent support workshop I attended. I\’m going to pass it on to another parent- and continue looking for more material to read.
Rating: 3/5 336 pages, 2016
2 Responses
Friend, I am sending so much love. A kid I love has also recently been grappling with his identity in this way, and I know his parents are — like you — so fearful about the possibility of harming him. But I know you know that the most important things are to love your kid and listen to them, and I am holding you and your family in my heart.(For whatever it's worth, Goodreads reviews can say a lot of nonsense. I haven't found them enormously useful in the past, especially for books that deal with really difficult issues.)
Thank you Jenny. Your words mean a lot to me. I don't know why I put more weight in Goodreads voices than the other place, I suppose I thought because it's a bunch of readers! it won't be biased! but of course they can be skewed or pressured just as anywhere else.